By Vinny Grudge · 1mo ago
For a rivalry that starts every morning at the same breakfast table, DamnBrit vs. PatBerry has been remarkably lopsided in one direction. Twelve meetings, nine wins for PatBerry, two for DamnBrit, one tie. Pat holds the deed to this one.
The nadir came in 2023, week 13: PatBerry 111.70, DamnBrit 33.36. A 78-point margin against a manager who has spent much of dynasty life being called the league's perma rebuilder, sitting on a stockpile of future picks while her husband's roster torched her lineup in real time. Not a great week to be hoarding draft capital.
But history has a sense of humor, and so, apparently, does the schedule. In 2026, week 11, DamnBrit finally got a win over Pat — 0.00 to 0.00. The tightest game in the rivalry's history is also the strangest: nobody scored a point, and somehow Hannah still came out ahead. Fitting for a manager who has her own theory about football being mostly luck in the years you don't make the playoffs.
Elsewhere in the archives, jgianares has needed extra innings to handle both CapitanKampana (6-4-2) and cbbrew (6-6-1), and Cmoney7 has quietly owned ssbradley40 at a 9-2-2 clip. None of those come close to the imbalance sitting under one roof. PatBerry runs this house — statistically speaking, anyway. Ask him how the actual house feels about it.